Pregnancy is one thing, but parenthood – especially in those newborn days – is an entirely different challenge. Transitioning between the two can be a fraught time, to say the least, with difficult issues warring with excitement. So, with that in mind, here are a few key things to keep in mind to help make this transitionary period a little smoother as you adjust to your life becoming quite different.
Emotional Changes
Pregnancy comes with its own set of emotional changes and swings as your hormone levels fluctuate and as you deal with the discomfort that is, for so many, an inherent part of being pregnant. The first weeks and months of parenthood are frequently the same – though for some, even more pronounced. Keeping an eye on your emotional well-being is vital, as some form of postnatal depression can affect up to 1 in 8 women and up to 1 in 10 men. And these changes can sneak up slowly. If you’re ever worried about yourself or someone else, talk about how things are going – this can be with each other, friends, or healthcare professionals. Getting treatment early can make a world of difference.
Physical Changes
It’s no secret that having a baby has some pretty profound changes on your body. While some of those changes revert in the months and years after your baby is born, there are other changes that just become the new normal – and still more that only arrive after. Adaptation is the name of the game here. Whether it’s changes to your sleep patterns, nutritional requirements, or just the new shape of your body, being flexible in how you deal with them is key. And yes, that includes what is often our mantra – look after yourself. A little bit of self-care goes a long way.
Bonding with Baby
Contrary to what movies will tell you, not everyone bonds with their baby immediately upon laying eyes on them. For a large number of people, bonding is an ongoing process that can take anything from hours, days, weeks, or, in some cases, months to fully develop. This process can be further affected by traumatic birthing experiences, health issues, or exhaustion. So, how do you build up a bond? Touch and eye contact are two huge factors. Skin-to-skin immediately after birth, with both parents, goes a long way to helping parent and baby learn about each other, as does making and maintaining frequent eye contact – feeding time is an especially good time for this. Otherwise, it’s a case of just showing them they’re loved, and the bond will follow. And this goes for more than just mum – if you’re planning to express breastmilk, you can grab a Haakaa Gen 3 Breast Pump and Bottle Nipple. It lets you pump milk, then swap the flange for the nipple and feed baby, all without having to transfer your milk! Even better, it has other attachments to keep the bottle body going longer – right through to toddlerhood, in fact.
Get a Routine Going
Routines may not be flash, but they can prove to be absolute lifesavers, both for you and bubs. Having a structure that means you both know what is coming up helps provide some calm in an otherwise chaotic time and helps babies feel more secure and settled. Routines don’t mean fixed-to-the-second schedules, either, so don’t feel you have to have your whole day timetabled out. Instead, it’s about predictable rhythms. A very commonly used routine is to feed when baby wakes, have awake time that’s used for changes, and, when they’re older, play (and this includes tummy time when you’re ready to introduce it), then finally getting them ready for sleep again. Newborns have very short awake times, so keep an eye out for their tired signs, which you’ll begin to learn as time goes on. You’ll figure out what works for you as time goes on, so don’t feel you have to have it planned out before baby arrives – if you feel something needs changing to fit in with your circumstances, feel free to do what is best for you.
Partner Communication
Having a newborn means we’re often busy and exhausted and end up forgetting about everything other than the baby. That’s why making a conscious effort to keep communication with partners open is so important. Ensuring you’re on the same page helps you remember that even before you were parents, you were a team, and communicating with one another helps you maintain that teamwork and prevents misunderstandings or resentments from building up.
Support Systems
That being said, it’s not unusual to not want to rely solely on one other person. That’s why having other external support systems away from each other is also enormously beneficial. Friends and family can be an amazing source of comfort, or you might try looking into parenting groups. These can be great as they’ll be filled with others who are at the same stage as you and your family, giving you peers to bounce ideas off. Some parent groups even organise visits from professionals to help with any concerns about anything to do with your baby or yourself in those early months and years.
Professional Help
In continuation of the professional help mention, if you feel you’re still struggling, utilise any professional support services you have available to you. This can be anything from your GP to helplines, including things like PlunketLine or Healthline – your country may have equivalent services that have maternity and early childhood specialists available to help.
There are a lot of things you have to deal with as you make the transition from pregnancy to parenthood, and some are more difficult than others. Try out a few things on this list, or use it as a jumping-off point to find what works for you. Remember, everyone is different, and so the things that will help will also be different. What’s important is that you find a way that makes getting through these changes as easy on you as possible.